Every now and again a football supporter sees something truly amazing. For fans of Barcelona it's a piece of mind-blowing Lionel Messi skill. For Real Madrid fans it's yet another Cristiano Ronaldo wonder hat-trick. For German supporters it was the last gasp piece of Mario Gotze brilliance to win the World Cup. But for Bolton Wanderers fans that moment of gasping astonishment is trying to work out this: Just how is it possible for our players to be so bad, and to show such little passion for the shirt they are paid thousands of pounds per week to wear?
Last night's brutal battering at the hands of Fulham - a team who hadn't won a league match all season until Saturday - was the worst perfornance I have seen in the 25 years I can remember being a Bolton supporter. And that is saying something given the drivel we have had to put up with at times.
Not only did the Whites not manage to get a shot on target last night - in fact we've only had 7 shots on target in our last 3 matches - we also seemed hell-bent on giving Fulham as many goals as possible. The end result could quite easily have been 8-0, as the Fulham midfield, led by the likes of Bryan Ruiz and Scott Parker, simply walked through our team at ease and the impressive strikeforce of Hugo Rodallega and Ross McCormack found themselves in acres of space at all times.
Once again Dougie Freedman's team selection set us up to fail, as he made four changes from the team that lost to Derby at the weekend. He inexplicably dropped our best striker Joe Mason, who remains our only striker to have scored from open play in the league, brought in the clueless Darren Pratley and put Neil Danns - who is clearly a central midfield player - on the right-wing, as Liam Feeney - who is clearly a right winger - switched to the left-wing.
This saw Craig Davies play the sole striker role. Now when you play a big man up front you have to give him some kind of service, be it into feet or in behind the defence. I can't remember Davies getting a single ball played into his feet the whole time he was on the pitch and he certainly didn't get a chance to turn his marker or even run at the defence. He was literally fighting a losing battle thanks to Freedman's bizarre, inept tactics. I could have marked him from the stands last night.
But special mention for ineptitude goes to Dean Moxey. How on earth is this man getting picked to play for our club week after week? And how on earth has he ever played in the Premier League? Every time I see Moxey he just gets worse than the last time I saw him - his debut at Watford was atrocious, and he gifted Chelsea a goal with the world's worst throw-in last week. Last night he was faced with a 20-year-old kid playing on the right-wing, Lasse Christiansen, but he didn't get close to him all match. He didn't even try and give the youngster a kick to let him know he was in for a tough night. I'd rather have Paul Robinson back than see this clown play for us ever again.
The fact that these players are getting paid so much, yet deliver a performance as abject as last night's makes my blood boil. Why should us hard-working supporters shell out £30 on tickets (plus the travel money to get to Fulham) only for the team to quite clearly not give a damn. I think there were about 450 Bolton fans at Craven Cottage last night, multiply that by £30 and it's £13,500 - which I imagine some of our players earn every week, so if we dock our players some of their wages they can easily raise that money to compensate us in some way. After all that this team, this manager and the board have put us through, that is the least they can do for the abysmal effort they put in last night.
So, onto the ratings for Bolton against Fulham last night. And it's not going to be pretty.
GK Andy Lonergan 4: Lonergan has been in decent nick of late, with an outstanding performance at Chelsea and a penalty save against Derby. But tonight he was back to the Lonergan we know and hate. His kicking, in particular, was atrocious - sending countless long balls towards the head of Liam Feeney on the left flank. Utterly pointless. I can't actually remember him making a save though..
RB Chris Herd 6: The man on loan from Aston Villa did very little wrong, especially considering I'm not convinced he's actually a right-back. He worked hard and defended better than most, given he was offered zero protection from a non-existent midfield.
CB Matt Mills 3: Mills has been a colossus at the heart of our defence recently, but his abysmal error for Fulham's opener simply set the tone for the rest of the team.
CB Dorian Dervite 5: Did little wrong, but it's hard to say he did well in a defence that took a battering and was completely overrun.
LB Dean Moxey 1: Everything Moxey did was awful. The man can't pass, doesn't want to be in possession of the ball, didn't support Feeney when he received Lonergan's pointless long kicks, and didn't make an attempt to get forward. He is awful.
DM Tim Ream 5: Ream must be wondering what's going on when he's being put in a different position every time he plays. I'm not convinced he's a midfielder, but he's certainly a better sitting option than Spearing or Medo if we're going to play 5 in midfield. However, last night it seemed pretty pointless playing him in that role as Ruiz and Parker just flew straight past him on countless occasions.
RM Neil Danns 3: I struggle to see how Danns fits into this team. One thing is for certain, he is not a winger and he shouldn't be playing on the right-wing. He showed glimpses last night, but ultimately offered next to nothing in terms of a threat to the Fulham defence. One moment of pure anger came when Danns cut inside, held the ball up as Herd bust a gut to run 60 yards to get in front of him, only to see the midfielder smash the ball into the crowd from 35 yards out. Moron.
CM Jay Spearing 3: Spearing was back to his old self, wasteful in possession and not offering protection to the defence. If he's our 'holding' midfielder, then it's no wonder we're getting beaten every week.
CM Darren Pratley 2: This guy is a waste of space. He has no control of his body, doesn't have a touch, totally lacks composure and is a walking yellow card. He sent a pretty easy chance over off the crossbar in the first half, and did bugger all else for the rest of the match. Please get out of my club.
LM Liam Feeney 6: Feeney is the only player we have that seems to want to receive the ball and run at the opposition. He's by far and away our best player, with the exception of a fit Mark Davies, yet Freedman ridiculously throws him out on the left-wing. It makes absolutely no sense. Despite this, Feeney still looked decent against Fulham but it was just a shame we couldn't give him enough of the ball in the right areas of the pitch to really pose a threat. The lad needs some confidence, and that means letting him play in his preferred position and getting people in the box so he can get crosses in.
CF Craig Davies 6: I feel sorry for Davies, he's always given a thankless role in which he stands zero chance of receiving the ball, let alone trying to score a goal. That was the case again tonight, and he was taken off before he was given the opportunity to show Bolton fans what he can do. He's one of the few players who actually looks like he wants to play for Bolton.
Substitutes:
CM Mark Davies 6: I can only presume Davies wasn't quite match fit enough to start tonight, but he made an impact with his directness and willingness to run from midfield when he eventually did come on. However, the fact that we were already on a hiding to nothing meant he couldn't exert his influence on the game.
CF Joe Mason 5: Barely had a touch, and didn't get a chance to impose himself. Blatantly should have started the match up front with Craig Davies. We will never score without Mason on the pitch.
CF Jermaine Beckford 3: I've said it before and I'll say it again: This guy is useless. Beckford yet again missed a late chance in the box which he sliced miles wide, and his only other contribution was screaming like a girl when big Dan Burn tackled him by the corner flag. The sooner Beckford is no longer at my football club, the happier I will be.