TRANSFER: Bone-Idle Beckford Heads to PNE

Bolton Wanderers have tonight made countless thousands of supporters happy by shifting out feckless and bone-idle 'striker' Jermaine Beckford on loan to League One Preston North End.

Beckford, 30, looks to have played his last game for the club seeing as the deal inked with PNE sees the London-born forward join on loan to the expiry of his Wanderers contract.

Another of Dougie Freedman's hopeless signings, Beckford was top scorer last season with a paltry nine goals, though has yet to score in the league this time around.

He will link up with former Huddersfield Town and Leeds United boss Simon Grayson at Deepdale, which, excitingly, is just round the corner from my work.

We can now only hope and pray that the departure of Beckford leads to the signing of Eidur Gudjohnsen, who has been training with the Whites of late.

Ta ra Jermaine - don't let the door hit you on the arse heading out.