Match Preview: Bolton Wanderers v Wigan Pies

Bolton Wanderers welcome near neighbours and our absolute sporting inferiors Wigan Athletic to the Reebok Stadium on Saturday in yet another vital Championship fixture.

Now, because Wigan have zero history and are basically a new-starter club given a kick up the arse by a gobshite ex-Blackburn Rovers broken-leg victim (though he doesn't like to go on about that), this fixture only dates back to 1983 which, as I'm sure you all know, is the year of my birth. That first game, back on Boxing Day, ended up with a 1-0 win for Bolton.

Over the years, we have faced one another on numerous occasions, indeed Saturday's game is the 42nd between the clubs. Surprisingly, Wigan lead the way with 16 wins to our 15, though Bolton's own Julian Darby remains the top scorer between the two sides on four goals.

Wigan began the 2013/14 Championship season with former Bolton manager Owen Coyle at the helm. Not for the first time, Wigan looked at their bigger, better rivals down the road and picked an ex-Bolton guy to take them forward. However, in a manner befitting their tin-pot, two bob nature, they chose poorly and Coyle was a disaster. Sacked by December following a hilarious run of form that saw the one-time Premier League outfit and present Europa League candidates struggling in mid-table. Oh how we laughed.

Then, Dave Whelan, purveyor of shit tracksuits and overpriced trainers, appointed former Manchester City striker Uwe Rösler as Coyle's replacement. Since then, Wigan have found form (including a lucky FA Cup win over City Reserves), and find themselves in fifth place - although they endured a humiliating Europa League run which ended with three straight defeats to Rubin Kazan, Zulte Waregem and NK Maribor to finish bottom of their group.

Hilarious.

Wigan are currently on a good run of form, indeed they haven't lost since February, and will provide stern opposition to Dougie Freedman and his band of merry men and Chris Eagles.

Despite the millions ploughed into his own little fiefdom, Emperor Gobshite Whelan finds his team struggling for goals. On-loan Manchester United midfielder Nick Powell leads the way for Wigan on a meagre six goals, joint with Spaniard Jordi Gómez.

Coyle and his replacement have overseen a huge reinforcement of the playing staff, FFP be damned, and this is just further evidence of their willingness to cheat the system and generally be pretty despicable, including loan in half of the western world to aid their promotion prospects, the shits:

In

Summer

Winter

Out

Summer

Winter

So, not only are we facing a tough opposition, but we are also facing an evil empire, and we cannot let them prevail. Not when they are clearly such absolute bastards.