I feel like writing about the current state of the club both on and off the field would send this vulnerable writer into a coma, so I've decided to take a look at what five Bolton players, past or present, would be the most interesting to head down to the pub for a pint with. If you feel like I've missed anyone good out please let me know who your pick would be down below!
5) El-Hadji Diouf
Very much the bad boy of the club during his four year long tenure at the (then) Reebok Stadium. Diouf to me would be that guy who would obtain that adorable arrogance where he thinks he can pull any girl he wants and it gets increasingly more hilarious each time he gets turned down. On the flip side, however, you'll probably get chucked out of a few pubs because he spat on the bartender for not having smoky bacon crisps.
4) Ivan Campo
Who doesn't love Campo? The guy comes across as the most loveliest person to ever grace the earth. I reckon if he invited you out for a pint he'd take you to this seemingly quiet Spanish beer joint; he'd shake hands and hug at least ten people before getting to the bar and then he'd tell you that you can get anything you want because it's on him. Ivan also strikes me as a massive karaoke lad and he'll be belting out Don't Wanna Miss A Thing by Aerosmith before you can even finish your first round.
3) David Wheater
Speaking of people you can't dislike, anybody who's met Wheater or heard him speak outside of a football pitch knows just how much of a great lad he seems like. He's always cracking jokes and trying to make you laugh which makes him one of the top picks for a guy I'd love to have a drink with. Wheater, in my mind, is the guy who invites you to all the pub quizzes and you keep putting it off because it doesn't sound that good, but one day you eventually come along out of pure boredom and you end up having one of the best nights of your life courtesy of the Wheats and his general likeability.
2) Jay-Jay Okocha
No Bolton Wanderers list of any kind would be complete without Okocha. In my eyes Jay-Jay would be the fella who texts you to invite you out promising a quiet night at the pub but of course you end up going to the nearest nightclub where there's a rather big space on the dancefloor that Okocha commands all by himself and the whole club stares in awe at the gracious movement of Okocha as he grooves out to some generic house music.
1) John McGinlay
A true man of the people and someone who owns a bloody pub for christ's sake, super John McGinlay was always going to top the list. John strikes me as the kind of guy who'd text you to come down to his pub for a quiet drink and he'll throw you a surprise party for the anniversary of you first visiting, discounted drinks for everyone and just a really good time.
Did I miss any glaring players who you'd be dying to have a pint with? Do let me know who you'd have in this list in the comments!