Welcome, ladies and gents, to our latest feature here at LOV Towers: your weekly gambling guide.
Now, before we get started I'm just going to clear the air here. I am not, in any way, a gambling expert and I'm not going to pretend to be. The simple fact of the matter is that I love a bet at the weekend, whether it's on the Wanderers or otherwise, and hopefully we can all work together to make some money.
So, now that's out of the way, let's crack on. Obviously this is a pretty shit time to start a gambling feature considering the odds of Bolton Wanderers winning another game this season are longer than most horse dicks, but we'll test the water with it and see what happens.
This week's bookie of choice is SkyBet, simply because today's game will be shown live on Sky Sports.
They're likely to offer a plethora of pre-match price boosts (if you bet with them regularly you'll know all about those) but at the time of writing there aren't many on site yet.
One that does jump out at me is Gaston Ramirez to score first and Middlesborough to win 2-0. The 25-year-old Uruguayan is currently on loan from Southampton but is a bit of a pocket rocket going forward.
He's scored six times since arriving (compared to £11million Jordan Rhodes' solitary two goals) and will surely look to extend his stay at The Riverside should Boro find themselves in the top flight next season.
This is backed up even more by Wanderers' inability to score in recent weeks. Set pieces aside, we haven't had the ball in the net from open play in our last four games (Liam Trotter's strike against Preston was the last goal to come from a moving spherical object).
A large percentage of our newly relegated team of shitehawks will surely look to put on a show for any prospective summer buyers, but their general lack off ability to play football twinned with Boro's desire to win promotion to the Premier League will surely sink us with ease.
Bolton are currently 10/1 to win, which is bloody good odds considering we're now in a position to ruin accumulators up and down the country (NEVER back the early kick off - the first rule of accumulator betting) just as Blackpool did when their relegation was confirmed last season.
If you've got one spare it's probably worth sticking £5 on us just in case we do our best to upset the promotion party, however our last few televised games against promotion-chasing opposition have ended in tears; 3-0 against Bournemouth last season and 1-0 against Leicester the season before. We're 22/1 to win 1-0 which is a decent bet in my eyes - if we do win the game, it won't be by much. If, for some ridiculous reason, you fancy us to get something in today's early kick off, Bolton to win or draw is priced at a tasty 21/10; again, decent.
Personally I think it's going to be another day of misery for our beloved football club, so my tip of the weekend is:
Gaston Ramirez to score and Middlesborough to win to nil - 3/1 with SkyBet (It's under Player & Goal specials)
Think your tips are better than mine? You're probably right, so let me know in the comments below.
Peace out, and may the odds be ever in your favour.