Bolton’s 80/20 Weirdo Split: Guessing the 20%

I’m sure you’ve all read Marc Iles’ interview in the BEN with Bolton Wanderers midfield dynamo Karl Henry. You can have a look here, if not.

Netflix-baiting headline aside, there was one bit of the piece that I plucked out and found very interesting:

I haven’t had that many moves in my career but you tend to find it’s the same sort of thing in every dressing room – 80 per cent good lads, 20 per cent weirdos. And it’s no different here

As far as things go, I suppose it’s no different to the sort of workplace that you or I would be familiar with, Christ knows it’s true in my own.

One thing that has kept my interest in the story is wondering who the 20% might be? There are a few candidates, but I’ve worked out who the main suspects might be.

David Wheater

His quirky personality immediately brought him to mind. However, his in-depth knowledge of wrestling strikes him off the list. Speaking from personal experience, this doesn’t make him weird at all - it makes him proper cool and no doubt irresistible to the ladies.

Darren Pratley

A well-known collector of shrunken heads*, the Dazzler is a potential candidate for Karl Henry’s list.

Adam Armstrong

The on-loan Newcastle United man has a reputation since arriving Bolton as being someone very comfortable* with making more than three trips to the salad bar at the Harvester by the Reebok. I’m sure you’d agree this is very concerning.

Gary Madine

The Big Man*, has been spotted saving-and-restarting Football Manager when he loses a game - a shocking revelation.

Karl Henry

Finally, onto my main suspect.

If you were someone concerned about what a weirdo you were, would you accept it and embrace the strangeness, or would you attempt to bring in diversionary tactics and try and shift blame elsewhere? I know what I would do.

That said, Karl, if you’re reading - nobody gives a shit about how much of a weirdo you are/are not, because we love you and so say carry on.

*Disclaimer - these facts may not be facts, but things that I’ve made up because I’m operating on very little sleep after a flight yesterday.