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Five Things: Bolton Wanderers 0-1 Sheffield United

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Jonny looks at what went wrong for the Whites on Tuesday

Bolton Wanderers v Stoke City - Pre-Season Friendly Photo by Clive Brunskill/Getty Images

Fuck me, it’s getting all depressing again, isn’t it? Let’s get on with it before I start ranting.

  1. The Curious Case Of Mark Beevers

Jesus wept, Mark Beevers has taken a turn for the worst, hasn’t he? Several mistakes on Saturday and a bit of a howler on Tuesday too, he looks a shadow of his League One self. Remember last season when I was calling him Baevers? Well, Baevers no more. He’s a quivering wreck and needs a serious confidence boost before it’s too late.

2. Captain Karacan

What’s going on here then? I can’t understand why Karacan’s being named as captain when we have someone like David Wheater - with bags of Premier League and EFL experience - in our squad? Is there a lack of leadership? Do we not have more experienced players to pick up this mantle? Karacan is a baffling choice, although he did seem to be communicating well on Tuesday night which was encouraging. Maybe I’m making something out of nothing. Who knows.

3. Stuart Fucking Atwell

Pathetic excuse of an official. Had an absolute stinker. Wanker.

4. Light As A Feather

Is it just me or do we look really lightweight this season? Other than Gary Madine and Will Buckley, I honestly can’t think of one player with the muscular clout to actually make things happen, especially in centre midfield. We’re definitely missing someone - a tough tackling Scouser, perhaps - in that holding midfield role. It worked so well for us last season, and without it, it’s obvious we’re much worse defensively. I still can’t understand why Parky has changed his system so drastically.

5. Goals? What Goals?

My biggest fear is that I can’t see where our goals are going to come from. Last season we were scoring for fun, albeit in a much less competitive league, but still, there was fire in our bellies and common sense in our heads. This time out, it’s a different story. Devoid of ideas up and down the pitch, the lack of quality, creativity and all round willingness to succeed is absolutely staggering.

I’m worried, ladies and gents. Very worried indeed.